From: gorthol	Date: 03/04/2007 23:22:01

*returns some time later, having sought Melianic advice*

*raises his fist to knock and just tries the doorknob instead, finding it open*

You should be more careful. Any crazy could walk right in off the street.

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/04/2007 23:23:40

*smiles a little* I can deal with crazy. In limited quantities.

*pushes her things aside and makes room for you to sit* *tentatively* How are you feeling?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/04/2007 23:29:12

*takes his jacket off and tosses it over the back of a chair* *smiles too* You don't say.

*comes to sit beside you*

*folds his hands in his lap and stares at them* I talked to Melian. About us. About the baby.

*doesn't quite know how to continue*

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/04/2007 23:31:23

*pulls her legs up under her* Oh.

*doesn't try to meet your eyes* What did she say?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/04/2007 23:34:23

*shrugs*

*glances over at you* Things I should have considered. Like the fact that if we get married and things between us...don't go the way we'd hope for, you'll only resent me in the long run. We'd resent each other.

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/04/2007 23:36:24

*softly* We don't have to get married if you don't want to.

*does look up at you this time* Túrin? How do you feel about me?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/04/2007 23:44:43

*really takes stock of his feelings for the first time* I care for you a great deal. I think you're sweet and loving and intimidatingly gorgeous and a hell of a lot of fun and a terrible influence on me. *with a hint of humor* Which may or may not be a bad thing, I don't know.

But I'm not in love with you. I want to see you happy but I just don't know if I'm the man who can give you that happiness. And I don't want to make you any promises I may not be able to keep.

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/04/2007 23:49:14

*thinks this over* I don't know. *wry smile* It seems to me there are worse things to base a relationship on than mutual affection. Like fake babies.

*inches closer to you and slips her hand into yours* You make me happy. You, just as you are. *laughs* When you're not fifty flavors of worried.

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/04/2007 23:55:32

*turns your hand in his and traces the delicate lines and curves of your skin with his other hand* Yeah. You'll notice I left out the amazing, incredible, mind-blowing sex. *smiles despite himself*

But a marriage, Fin? Marriage is serious business. To me, anyway.

*squeezes your hand lightly* But that is me. I'm a worrier. You call it saving the world but to me it's just duty. *sighs* I should be out looking for Nienor right now. I'm all she's got.

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:01:29

*leans her head against your shoulder* I wasn't serious. I know you well enough to know what comes with the package.

*concerned* But Túrin, what will you do if she's determined to stay away? She'll always find a way if she wants to. Don't you think she'll try to contact you if she gets into trouble?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:04:31

*slips his arm around you* It's not that simple. I know she's seemed sane lately but there's no telling what she might do. I chose not to put her back in that hospital. I'm responsible for her. I won't just abandon her.

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:07:47

*snuggles close* I'm not saying you should abandon her. But maybe she just needs a little time. You said you can see her, right? So look in on her now and then, make sure she's not in any serious trouble. If things get rough for her then go.

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:12:46

*doubtfully* I could try. I guess. *concentrates* I can see her walking. She's just walking. She doesn't look hurt or afraid of anything.

*brushes your hair back* I'm so tired, Fin. *suddenly vulnerable* And while I was chasing after my sister and losing my mind, I lost my best friend to boot. And now with you and the baby...

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:20:34

*runs a hand through your disheveled hair* See? It's not so hard. But you're no good to anyone if you drive yourself into the ground fretting and making yourself ill. You have to know that.

Just let it go. For a little while. Not forever. *kisses your cheek* Let me take care of you. I'll take care of you for the rest of my life, if you let me. *rubs your chest with a calming motion*

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:23:11

*in a small voice* I can't. If anything goes wrong it'll be my fault. Again.

*lets his head fall back against the cushions*

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:25:41

*cooing softly* You can. Nothing will go wrong.

*slides into your lap and smiles when your arms come around her* *brushes her lips over yours feather-lightly*

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:28:05

*returns your kiss almost against his will, but with a kind of fierce desperation*

*sighs half in pleasure and half in exasperation* Fiiiin. Tired means sleep. What are you doing?

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:37:11

What are you doing?

Making a baby?

Then come to bed if you want to sleep, silly boy. You don't have to love me. Just sleep next to me and let me be what you need tonight and then ask yourself if it might even be enough.

*begins loosening your clothing with movements that suggest she's just trying to relax you so you can sleep*

*nevertheless knows how you like to be touched, and does everything to encourage your arousal*

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:50:39

*takes you into your bedroom* No promises.

*lies in your arms afterward and wonders why the scenes belong to different films, and why they call it lovemaking when he's forgotten what love means, and why this day of all days has shaken him to the core*

*finally wonders if this is how it's done after all*

*sleepily* Fin?

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:52:38

*surfaces from near-sleep, your breath tickling her neck*

Mmm?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:54:07

*murmuring* Maybe it is. I don't know.

*rests his hand low on your belly*

	From: ivrinsun	Date: 03/05/2007 00:56:39

*nestles closer to your warmth*

Enough?

	From: gorthol	Date: 03/05/2007 00:58:26

*doesn't answer, his breaths slow and even*

*dreams of lands far from home*