opus_two <% /!UseJournal %>
09/06/2007 18:03:00
[info]fanuilos
*upon her return to Ilmarin, gets straight to business*

*makes sure the board room is set up, with place names and bottles of spring water (still and sparkling) in front of every seat*

*summons all of the Valar and waits for everyone to assemble*

I would like to open this Annual General Meeting of the Valar of Órë, with their attendant Maiar, formerly known as the Gathering at the Ring of Doom, or Máhanaxar. The board members are as follows: Eru Ilúvatar (ex-officio, in absentia), Manwë Súlimo, Varda Elentári, Ulmo, Aulë...

*carries on in this vein for a full ten minutes*

Before I proceed to the minutes of the previous meeting, are there any questions for the Chair?

Current Mood: busy
Tags: salmar, orome, yavanna, telimektar, turin, vana, varda, aulendil, manwe, arien, aule, ulmo, irmo, tilion

 
Comments
From: [info]aromez Date: 09/06/2007 14:15:11  

Where are the Cheetos?
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/06/2007 14:53:54  

*won't be thrown by this, won't be, wont be!*

If you proceed through the Agenda, Aromez, you will see that there will be a break at noon tomorrow for Cheetos and other sundries.
From: [info]aromez Date: 09/06/2007 15:14:17  

...

Can I have a Mountain Dew?
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 15:16:20  

*gets out of his seat and rifles through Manwë's the drinks cabinet*

*locates a Mountain Dew and tosses it towards you* There you go, Uncle Oromë!

Anyone else for anything? No? *ambles back to his seat and sits down, putting his feet up on the board table*
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/06/2007 15:27:33  

*tries, fairly unsuccessfully, to hide her annoyance* Gentlemen, please, if we could just proceed to the minutes of the previous AGM?
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 15:30:56  

*shrugs* I've already read 'em, Lady Varda. To be honest? It doesn't start well and the end kind of trails off and the middle isn't anything to write home about.
From: [info]a3ulez Date: 09/06/2007 15:33:12  

*ruefully* He's right, Varda. These meetings just don't have the same oomph as the Máhanaxar.
From: [info]tuivana Date: 09/06/2007 16:50:26  

I still think the meetings ought to be recorded and properly indexed and filed. What wouldn't be interesting about minutes if we could hear Yavanna's screeching at the touch of a button?
From: [info]a3ulez Date: 09/06/2007 16:52:10  

*mildly* Personally, my favourite part is always when Varda storms off, slamming all the doors in the place.
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/06/2007 17:11:57  

*drops her folder on the table with a loud bang* Aulë! Vána! Telimektar! Oromë! Please! We have serious! Business! To! Attend! To!
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/06/2007 17:30:48  

*Fixes you with a very steady, very cold glare.*
From: [info]high_smith Date: 09/06/2007 18:02:47  

I don't think he likes that, sir.
From: [info]a3ulez Date: 09/06/2007 19:28:46  

*hiding behind his folio* Between you and me, Aulendil, he doesn't like much these days.
From: [info]high_smith Date: 09/06/2007 19:36:20  

Just thought it'd be prudent to point it out to you, sir.
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/07/2007 11:09:27  

*ha fucking ha*

*has her FULL REPORT on the CARNAGE indexed, copied, and distributed to the full committee*

*is ready to go aside from wondering if she's close enough to Oromë to kick him under the table if need be*
From: [info]tuivana Date: 09/07/2007 11:15:04  

*would really prefer that you refrain from touching her husband, thank you*

*even? especially? to kick him*
From: [info]ilinsor Date: 09/06/2007 19:50:34  

*smuggles you some Cheetos under the table*

*very thoughtfully packed them in a Ziploc baggie so you won't make too much noise with them HAHAHAHAHA*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 17:28:55  

are there any questions for the Chair?

Yes.

*holds up a copy of the Delving Enquirer*

Who the hell told the papers that my alter-ego's been snorting coke off a toilet seat?
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/06/2007 17:49:58  

*sighs* I fail to see how this is in any relevant to the bigger picture, Ullubôz.
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 17:51:08  

It...isn't really. I'm sorry. It just really irritates me, I haven't been snorting coke recently.
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 19:27:24  

*resists the urge to roll her eyes* An official denial, complete with a strongly worded letter threatening to sue for libel, has already been issued. Lord Ulmo.
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 19:32:21  

AWESOME. Free publicity! Good one Salmar. Has it affected the ratings? I bet they've gone up? They've gone up, haven't they?
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 19:33:51  

Is there anyone of telling you that they have without you becoming insufferably smug?
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 19:35:37  

Why do you ask questions to which you already know the answer?
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 19:36:47  

*in a distinctly gloomy voice* Because I'm a mindless optimist? Eru only knows why.
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 19:39:58  

*Picks up a bottle and pours you a glass of water.*

Here. Have a mineral water and turn that frown upside down.*

*Thinks if that can't cheer you up, nothing can. Because it's water. WATER! <3 :D*
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/06/2007 19:32:14  

*gets the chorus to some annoying Top 40 song firmly stuck in the back of his mind in case anybody at the meeting feels like taking a peek where they shouldn't*

*digs way down to find the old Túrin, the Baby Vala with a Heart of Gold-or-at-least-Copper persona* *was happy to be rid of that one, too, dammit*

*appears twenty minutes late for the start of the meeting and feigns chagrin* Guess I'm in the right place then.
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/06/2007 19:35:49  

*smiles at you warmly* You are. You're also late! Take a seat, please, Túrin. We were just listening to Ulmo denying he has a coke habit the minutes of the previous AGM. This will be interesting for you seeing as you hadn't recovered your Ainur memories by that stage.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/06/2007 19:46:11  

*smiles back at you* Oh, good. There's still a lot I'm missing, to be honest. *thinks that's sort of true if you consider all those years in the Void*

*finds an empty chair as far away from Manwë as possible and sits back to listen (and pinch himself awake periodically)*
From: [info] Date: 09/06/2007 19:50:59  

*nods at you in a friendly sort of manner* Mountain Dew, man?
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/06/2007 19:55:42  

*looks back at you as though remembering the good old days*

Well if it isn't Mister Apocalypse. *easily* No, thanks. I'm good.
From: [info]azie Date: 09/06/2007 20:12:21  

*moves up and down the table, distributing copies of the agenda , once Varda has finished droning on reading out the minutes of the last meeting*
From: [info]ilinsor Date: 09/06/2007 20:18:58  

*as you pass him* Arien, can I get one of those? *trying to get your attention* Hey, Arien? Did I forget my body again?
From: [info]azie Date: 09/06/2007 20:20:43  

Fine. *slams one down in front of you*
From: [info]ilinsor Date: 09/06/2007 20:29:40  

*starts* *completely befuddled* I told you I wouldn't be in town to water your azaleas! The one's still okay I think.
From: [info]azie Date: 09/06/2007 20:34:11  

It's not about the damned azaleas, Tilion. Now would you bloody well pay attention to Varda?
From: [info]ilinsor Date: 09/06/2007 20:40:19  

*somewhat meekly but mostly just confusedly* Yeah, all right already. Had the milk gone off?

*listens to Varda with half an ear but glances at you from time to time whenyou'renotlooking*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 20:19:46  

*Reluctantly accepts his copy of the agenda.*

How could you do this to me? ;)
From: [info]azie Date: 09/06/2007 20:21:20  

*smiles sweetly at you* If I have to endure this, so do you, Mr "Cocaine" Conway.
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/06/2007 20:28:15  

*Eyebrow raise*

Everything quite all right there, Mrs. Waterson?
From: [info]azie Date: 09/06/2007 20:29:42  

*firmly* Fine. Tilion's just being his usual inexplicably annoying self harbouring mortal whores in his apartment.
From: [info] Date: 09/07/2007 11:01:02  

*takes a seat at the far end of the table, after inconspicuously swiping a bag of Fritos*

*is briefly interrupted from tuning Túrin's signal when he suddenly has to snicker at a passing headline* :]
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/07/2007 17:11:46  

Are we amusing you, Irmo?

*folds her arms, already unimpressed with, so far, Oromë, Aulë, Telimektar, --*
From: [info] Date: 09/07/2007 17:17:10  

*coughs and clears his throat* *decisively* No ma'am.

*hooks up his voice-recorder, at the ready*

*goes back to listening until the higher-ups decide to get to him the meeting really gets going*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/07/2007 17:30:33  

*oh, dearly hopes she is isn't on that list*
From: [info] Date: 09/07/2007 17:46:50  

*chews his lip, dearly wishing he could take a nap, in spite of the fact he's never slept in his life*

*whips out a pen and starts scribbling physics problems out (just for fun, you understand)*

*gives this up after a while and draws out a naughts-and-crosses grid* *plonks an 'X' square in the middle and pushes the page towards you*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/07/2007 21:49:17  

*pulls the paper closer and adds an "O" in a top corner*

*after a couple more turns, decides they need to move straight on to Dots & Boxes because wow Varda's going to go on for a while it'll take the nerves off her big report coming up*
From: [info] Date: 09/08/2007 13:01:57  

*approves* *covers an entire A4 page with dots and, after careful consideration, draws a line*

*half-listens to Varda but mostly concentrates on the fierce competition*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/08/2007 13:49:27  

*trades lines with you*

*manages to cover most of the paper before either of them have filled in a box*

*taps the end of her pencil on the desk edgily*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/08/2007 13:47:25  

I was aiming for the gents, okay?
From: [info] Date: 09/08/2007 13:50:38  

...

Experimentation is perfectly understandable, sir.
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/08/2007 19:35:31  

*can't help but feel that people are, quite simply, not paying attention*

If we could proceed to the matter of annual reports? Is there anyone who'd like to volunteer to go first?
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/08/2007 19:41:07  

*drops her pencil* *finally has the floor*

*barely even notices the new guy back there*

*stands up and starts distributing the bound copies of her report*
From: [info]a3ulez Date: 09/08/2007 19:43:25  

*takes his copy from you, brushing his fingers lightly over the back of your hand by way of offering silent support*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/08/2007 19:48:38  

*loses her cool concentration for just a second as she does so*

*kind of smiles as she picks up her stride again*

Now, as you can see from the table on page 33 --let's flip right there, shall we?-- especially in the deer population, we're experience heavy increases in CARNAGE antagonistic activity. I'm recommending quotas be tightened across the board.
From: [info]aromez Date: 09/09/2007 00:22:34  

*glances at the number*

*suddenly feels... what's that... huh... remorse?*

...

Oh, Eru, I haven't killed enough.
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/09/2007 09:38:12  

*overhears this*

*just points at you and gives Manwë a look that says "SEE?!?"*
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/09/2007 09:55:42  

*sighs and rubs her temples* Yavanna. Oromë. We've had this before. We don't want a repeat of the Mastadon Incident from Arda but neither do we want the poor mortals to be over-run by a particular breed of animal. Balance is the key, balance!
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/09/2007 10:50:25  

*mutters something under her breath about Oromë and balance and a dictionary*

*very, very grudgingly tries to take Ulmo's advice*

I'm willing to relax the numbers by 2% but the population needs to recover I can't support targeted attacks on one area that's definitely not balanced either.
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/09/2007 13:59:04  

Good start but be prepared to haggle, Yavanna.
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/09/2007 14:00:46  

Everyone knows you start low anyways.
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 09:40:35  

*watches this patiently*

*knee jiggles up and down, waiting for his turn*

(*has actually very much noticed the new guy*)
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/09/2007 12:56:05  

*surreptitiously glances at his watch from time to time*

*can't remember whether your lot has always been this boring or if it's worsened over time*
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 13:56:32  

*puts up his hand to stake his spot in line until the bickering dies down*

*tries to get Ulmo's attention*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/09/2007 14:03:02  

*Looks up at you after tearing himself away from admiring the cut of Arien's blouse reading his papers.*
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 14:05:24  

*slides the voice recorder down the table to you with the data they saved*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/09/2007 14:18:01  

*Catches it*

*Clears his throat pointedly.*
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/09/2007 18:28:54  

Ullubôz? You have something to bring to the table, obviously.
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 18:31:03  

*doesn't bother to hide her alarm at this*

*doesn't know what her Boss is up to but has the fear, nonetheless*
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/09/2007 18:33:20  

That I do, sir.

*Gets to his feet*

Now, I know what you're going to say; "Ullubôz, you charismatic stallion, it's not like you to even come to an AGM, let alone make a presentation, this must be something important!"

Well, it is...

*Walks towards the multimedia station at the end of the table and plugs in Irmo's recorder.*
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 18:36:12  

*rests her forehead on the table* Oh. Eru. No.

*sits up again suddenly when she hears the sound issuing from the recorder*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/09/2007 18:42:55  

*jumps a little*

What the shit?
From: [info]a3ulez Date: 09/09/2007 18:44:49  

*with severity* Is this some sort of joke, Ullubôz?
From: [info]ulluboz Date: 09/09/2007 18:51:52  

Wish it were, A3ulez.

Irmo picked up this signal a few days ago in Delving. He's heard it three times, every time in relation to certain mortals. The last time we picked up, the mortal in question was hospitalised with critical injuries; he may never completely recover. I got there as soon as I could, hence the amusing headlines in the tabloids.

Now, we all know what it sounds like, question is, do we believe it? If not, is that because it really is impossible or because we don't want to belive that it's possible?
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 18:53:27  

You did kill him good and proper, didn't you, kid?
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 08:35:45  

*crosses his arms and looks mildly offended*

*privately amused that no one seems to want to say the name* Melkor? Yeah. I did. Technically.
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/09/2007 18:44:56  

*Stays silent and quickly scans the room, taking note of everyone's reactions.*
From: [info]fanuilos Date: 09/09/2007 18:46:07  

*closes her fingers around your forearm and listens*
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 18:50:07  

*for the first time since the Dagor Dagorath, looks a little shaken*
From: [info]azie Date: 09/09/2007 18:55:20  

*actually loses her cool a little and trembles at the sound*

Please, please, turn it off!
From: [info] Date: 09/09/2007 18:57:01  

*reaches over the table and does so*

*relaxes visibly*
From: [info]high_smith Date: 09/09/2007 18:58:24  

*twitches*







*twitchtwitchtwitchtwich*
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 08:38:15  

*continues sitting quietly and watching everyone, much as Manwë is doing at the moment*

*looks at you for just a fraction of a moment longer*
From: [info]tuivana Date: 09/10/2007 08:41:56  

*half to herself* It should be easy enough to analyze the Music for authenticity. If it's not a hoax, there are few possible explanations. Which is the most logically correct?
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/10/2007 13:23:39  

*grimaces* It's got to be a hoax. I mean come on.
From: [info] Date: 09/10/2007 13:25:13  

*decisively* The recording is real. It's new.

*looks at Túrin* *without any overtones* I heard you there too.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 13:33:34  

*smirks* *raises an eyebrow* Which mortal did you say you picked this bit up from?
From: [info] Date: 09/10/2007 13:39:37  

His name's Mablung. This was the strongest. *plans to ask Manwë later for authority to see to him*

I heard you there in the first one. *frowns* That's listening where you shouldn't be.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 14:05:16  

*gives no sign that anything about Mablung or his situation is remotely familiar to him*

That's listening where you shouldn't be.

*coolly* You're one to talk. Can't a guy have a private conversation with his ex without Dad's do-good squad eavesdropping?
From: [info] Date: 09/10/2007 14:19:03  

*likewise gives no sign he knows what else is going on with Beleg*

That's more than eavesdropping. *bristles at your tone* I don't eavesdrop, I take care of distressed souls and I've noticed two people in distress and thinking of you when they were.

*hasn't personally put you together with Mablung yet, given the severity of the discord poured into his mind* *two points is a line, not a pattern, what?*
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 14:24:43  

I take care of distressed souls

*eyeroll* Would you like a medal? Here's a tip for you: Don't try to piece together the intricacies of Kindred relationships until you've been one yourself. *thinks that sounds really excellent and convincing and all*

two people

*innocently* Oh, really? Who's the other poor, distressed soul then? *knows you can't possibly be associating him with Mablung or the whole lot of you would be up in arms by now*
From: [info] Date: 09/10/2007 14:40:06  

Don't try to piece together the intricacies of Kindred relationships until you've been one yourself

*knows more about the secrets of Kindred relationships than you could ever dream, my friend* *since he'd hear your dreams too*

*tacitly* Her name is Nellas.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 14:46:53  

*looks you straight in the eye*

Who?
From: [info] Date: 09/10/2007 22:46:31  

*looks at you a little warily as though you must be confused (because he's definitely not)*

You should stay out where you don't belong. Their thoughts are private and protected.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/10/2007 22:55:54  

*dryly* Duly noted.

*scans the agenda disinterestedly* *idly wonders whether Aulë's or Vendórë's reports hold any potential for less dullness or if you're all really every bit as impotent as you seem*
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/11/2007 07:11:42  

*half gesturing at Túrin, half looking at Manwë*

So if he killed him, why are we getting this now?
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/13/2007 08:43:51  

I don't know but we'll find out. What we're not going to do...*sternly* is bicker amongst ourselves. That acheives nothing.

I want a guard put on this Mablung if that hasn't already been done so. Irmo, you go and see him, see what you can dredge up.
From: [info]gorthol Date: 09/13/2007 08:46:58  

What we're not going to do is bicker amongst ourselves. That acheives nothing.

*covert eyeroll*
From: [info] Date: 09/13/2007 08:47:06  

*has been itching at the chance*

Will do sir, right away.
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/13/2007 08:51:40  

*volunteers for the guard duty*

*finds herelf a little unsatisfied after all this bickering and not a single punch thrown, OME*
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/13/2007 09:08:42  

We're all in agreement then?
From: [info]yavannapalurien Date: 09/13/2007 09:12:23  

*tables up her pile of notes & reports*

*gives a nod*
From: [info] Date: 09/13/2007 09:13:32  

*nods*
From: [info]tuivana Date: 09/13/2007 09:25:18  

And I can outfit the mortal with a tracking device for maximum security?

*crickets*

Then again maybe not?
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/13/2007 09:39:50  

*Thinks tracking might be a good idea but not necessarily for Mablung.* ¬_¬

Stay behind so I can have a word in private, would you Vána?
From: [info]tuivana Date: 09/13/2007 09:47:28  

*is a little surprised but gives no outward indication of it*

*transmitting faint curiosity* Affirmative, Mânawenûz.
From: [info]manawenuz Date: 09/13/2007 08:19:26  

Dad's do-good squad

*Thinks that little turn of phrase sounds just like something a certain relative of his would say.*
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